I am alone. I sit on the couch with the lights off, the blackout curtains drawn, and the ceiling fan rhythmically whirring above me. I have a cold beer nearby, and alcohol slightly further out of reach. You know, just in case this game goes the way I think it will. My soulless eyes, which normally serve as a window to my broken spirit, reflect the FOX pregame show. My eyes glaze over as they build the narratives around the game. It is the first time in history one of the leading stories in a playoff matchup began with the sentence “Barry Church had this to say.” It’s finally over. They’ve given their picks. Rob Riggle has wiped whatever was left of a smile off my face. Footage of Romo bobbling the snap is shown. I clutch my beer tightly.
It’s time.